Reverse Frychology
by x-Fry-Fan-x
Summary: Pure adventure with a lazy robot, a Slurm addicted guy, and a one-eyed woman. Sound familiar? A must read if you LOVE Futurama!
1. A Sunny Morning

Reverse Fry-chology

It was a bright, sunny day in New New York. All of the Planet Express crewmembers were sitting around the large round table when the Professor came out of the kitchen. It was a week away from a very, very special holiday to everyone on Earth, as well as many planets all over the universe.

"Good news, everyone!" he surprisingly said, "Today, we get to deliver very special packages for Valentine's Day to the planet Htrae. It is a box of very special candies; if you eat one with someone you love, they will automatically fall in love with you. Whether they are useful or trouble, I'll never know. Use them at your own risk." the Professor babbled on, but Fry was listening intently.

"But, how could that be a bad thing? The candy, I mean. Make someone love you back? Everyone in the world would give anything for one of those," the orange-haired guy thought out loud.

Leela looked over at Fry from her seat and smiled. Fry has just walked out from the kitchen when he spoke. He carried a large dish of scrambled eggs and many glasses of cold Slurm for everyone, for breakfast. Leela eyed the glasses of green Slurm.

"Oh, please, Fry...Slurm at eight in the morning? Couldn't you have at least attempted to make some coffee? Who wants a carbonated beverage this early?"

Fry winked at Leela. "Oh, come on, Leela. Does the drink really matter? You know you love me!" Fry shouted, but then realized what he had said. He pursed his lips together, wishing he'd never said it. But somewhere deep inside him, he was glad he did. Leela grinned and took a glass of Slurm for herself.

Leela sipped the cold beverage and flinched at the taste. She hated the stuff, but it was from Fry, so she wanted to enjoy it and at least ACTED like she liked it, so he'd be happy. Leela tried to take a bite of the eggs on her plate, but she couldn't. Her stomach felt like it was spinning around and around. She felt really sick whenever she glanced over at Fry, sitting two seats down from her. She wondered why she felt this way. Was it that she possibly liked him...?

Dr. Zoidberg enjoyed his eggs and wolfed down the cup of Slurm in one big gulp.

"We don't have this back where I come from...wait, these eggs don't have scoliosis-meteuhzoa-amoeba in them, do they?" the large crab said in his mumbling, doctor-like voice. Everyone, including the Professor, stared at Zoidberg in confusion.

After the not-so-nutritious breakfast that Fry had whipped up, the entire Planet Express crew boarded the light-green, intergalactic spaceship.

It was Leela's week off, and unfortunate as it was, Zapp Brannigan was elected substitute captain for the entire week.

Kif Kroker sat in a small, uncomfortable chair next to the large blonde man. Kif was having a good day so far because Zapp had not ordered him to do anything dreadful or gross yet.

"Today is so good, for once," Kif whispered to himself, not intending for Zapp Brannigan to overhear, but, sure enough, he did.

"What was that, Kif?" Zapp said.

Kif gasped. "Nothing at all, sir." The alien assistant covered his face with his hands and sighed.

"You said you wanted to do a vile chore for me? Well, a back massage while I'm driving the ship WOULD take away the pressure of being Captain for the week..."

Kif sighed, yet again.

"I'll go get the lotion..."

The Zapper suddenly asked, "Which scents can I choose from?"

Kif Kroker let out another horribly long sigh.

"The choices are between lilac happy flowers, or bouncy bubbly roses."

Zapp grinned, as he took off the shirt and jacket part of his uniform, ready for the massage.

"I'll definitely have to take the lilacs, old chum."

Fry, Leela, Bender, and Amy Wong were all deciding how to deliver the Valentine's gifts without much trouble once they arrived at Htrae.

"Bender and Amy - you two can bring the teenage males their packages straight to their doors. Fry and I will take care of the girl's packages. You guys can go check the supplies, while I go to the front of the ship and make sure that SOMEONE isn't going to blow us up," Leela said in her professional and terse voice. Everyone knew that she was referring to Zapp.


	2. Leela's Tears

Leela went to the front of the ship to check on Zapp and Kif, and also to see how close they were to the Earth-like planet, Htrae. People called this planet "Earth's distant twin".

The three in the back were just finishing up checking all of the packages to make sure that they were secure and all okay.

While Bender and Amy were engrossed in checking the packages, Fry sat on a large box and just thought. The smile on his face somehow managed to turn upside-down. Fry was really upset as he thought about Leela, but he didn't know why.

How could thinking about someone you love make you feel so upset? Fry didn't know, and he wasn't sure he would know any time soon. Just the thought of Leela's beautiful face made Fry's stomach have butterflies.

Fry couldn't keep his feelings in any longer.

"Amy, Bender...I got a problem, and I need help," he said in a descending voice.

"What or who is it about?" Amy asked, very interested, as she adjourned checking the packages to listen.

"It's just about Leela, and-" Fry started, but he was interrupted.

"You guys done checking the packages? We've arrived at Htrae," a familiar "professional" voice spoke. Fry, Amy, and Bender stopped any movement or noise. All three crewmembers froze and stared at Leela, each one of them pretty shocked.

"What is it, you guys? Were you all just talking about me or something?" Leela asked angrily.

Bender broke the silence with a chuckle.

"Heh, heh. Yup." the robot said loud and obnoxiously.

"Bender!" Fry and Amy yelled at Bender in unison, mad at the robot.

"Whaaat? I'm just telling the truth," said Bender, "And, actually, Fry was just about to START talking about you...behind your back!" Bender gasped and pointed to the guy with the trademark red jacket.

Leela looked at Fry in disbelief.

"Fry...how...how could you?!" Leela yelled as a tear rolled down her cheek.

The orange-haired guy jumped down from the box and ran over to Leela. He put his arms on her shoulders and put on a serious face.

"I promise, I wasn't going to say anything bad about you...and I never will," Fry whispered as he wiped her tear away with his jacket sleeve.

Leela sniffed, hit Fry's hands, and then pushed him away.

"I'm sorry, Fry, but I find that hard to believe." Leela ran out of the room and into the kitchen. She was bawling the whole way there.

"Great going, Fry!" Bender exclaimed with a disgusted look on his face, "You made Leela really upset!"

"Shut up, Bender!" Fry shouted as he ran to his bedroom on the ship, "I'm mad at you!"

"Well, whatever! Don't come crawling back to me, mammal!"

Amy shook her head as she watched Fry run out the door. "Poor guy..."


	3. Zapp's Failed Attempts

CHAPTER 3

Meanwhile, in the very front of the ship, Zapp was enjoying his lilac-scented massage.

"Ooh...ahh...to the left...Wait, no! Go down a little bit!" the man said as he turned the keys in the ignition to turn off the ship.

"Kif, inform the crew that we've arrived at Htrae!" Zapp stood up, shirtless, with only his little red skirt on.

"Oh, jeez..." Kif said as he covered his eyes with his hands.

Fry started to cry on his bed. He hugged his pillow and pretended that it was Leela, warm and close to him.

"Great, just great!" he screamed as he cuddled his pillow even more and cried his tears into it.

"Bender! In case you can hear me, you're the worst friend EVER!"

Bender did indeed hear what Fry had said. The robot was saddened to know how mad Fry was at him. At first, Bender took the whole thing as a joke, but he realized how he could have just ruined two relationships: his and Fry's friendship, and Leela and Fry's friendship, which could have possibly even been a love.

Zapp picked up his tight red shirt and put it on. He saw Fry and Leela both run to their rooms, crying. Zapp was suspicious, so he walked up to Leela's door and knocked.

"Leela, are you okay?" Zapp asked through the door.

The one-eyed girl looked up from her pillow.

"Zapp?" she guessed. "I'm really not in the mood to talk..."

Zapp Brannigan gave up, so he tried to talk to Fry. He walked over to the door, a couple away from Leela's and he knocked.

"Leela, is that you?!" Fry exclaimed.

"This is Zapp..." the man said, "...are you alright? I saw you looking pretty upset."

Fry tried to hide the sound of his voice; the sound after you've just cried, that sniffling sound that he had always hated, because Leela heard it often.

"Thanks, but...I'm a little busy, you know...getting ready to deliver those packages."

The Zapper knew that Fry was lying.

"Well, if you ever need to talk, I'm here." The Big Z said.

Zapp walked out to where Kif was, to the front of the ship. Bender was also there.

"Bender, do you have any idea what ha-" Zapp started.

"YES, I DID IT! I'M SORRY!" Bender started to wail and pound his fists on the door that led to the outside world.

Zapp shrugged in confusion and walked out the door. Right as he stepped out, he stopped to feel his velour shirt.

"Ah..._velour,_" he said, satisfied with himself, as usual.


	4. Professor Tries to Profess

After Zapp left the ship, he started to really worry about Leela and Fry. Kif ran out and accompanied the short-term captain. The two started to walk into town.

"Kif," Zapp began, "I trust that you are aware of what we get to do today."

Kif stuttered, "N-no, what are we doing today, sir?"

Zapp chuckled, and then got serious.

"That is CAPTAIN Brannigan to you, Kif," the Big Z stated, pointing his finger in his assistant's face, "That is why you will never make the title of lieutenant."

Kif sighed. "Sir, but I already--"

Before Kif could go on, Zapp put his hand in front of Lieutenant Kroker's face.

"Shhh, Kif. This planet is inhabited by the most dangerous species of animal in the entire universe."

"And that is…?" the green alien asked in curiosity.

"Human!" Brannigan cried.

"But, sir, isn't that your species?" Kif pointed out in his shy voice.

"Oh, yeah. I…uh…kind of forgot for a second," Zapp said dumbly.

The large blonde captain was struggling to think of a fun place for himself and Kif to enjoy.

"Let's go get a cup of joe!" Zapp Brannigan exclaimed as he aimlessly pointed to the sky.

Kif sighed.

"No, sir…I mean Captain…Captain Brannigan. Can we go somewhere decently entertaining?

Now, out of the blue, the Big Z exhaled a long, doleful sigh.

"Kif, why must you be so boring and uninteresting?"

Kif frowned and his shoulders drooped. He slapped his forehead, amazed at Zapp's stupidity, yet again.

Fry was still in his big, empty bedroom, bawling. He continued to hug the pillow, to pretend that everything was okay again.

'_This won't be so bad_,' Fry thought, '_It'll all pass soon._'

Fry threw his tear-soaked pillow and walked out of his room, desperately trying to hold back his tears.

Fry made his way to the ship's tiny kitchen. He poured out a large bowl of Bachelor Chow and started to chew on it as he sat at the little table, where he usually ate breakfast with Leela every single morning.

The Professor and Dr. John Zoidberg just happened to walk into the kitchen, and they sat at the table with Fry.

Zoidberg stared at Fry with shock.

"Where's Leela already? She eats human food with you all the time, usually," the Decadion said in his deep voice.

Fry didn't even glance at Zoidberg; he just continued to chomp on his watery bowl of Bachelor Chow.

"Zoidberg?!" yelled the Professor, "When did you get here? What do you think this is, clown school?!"

"Yes," replied Zoidberg, matter-of-factly.

The Professor sighed and said, "Get out of here, you big lobster, so Fry and I can talk about important matters not regarding you!"

"Nobody loves Zoidberg." The big doctor strolled out.

"But what about clown school?" he said as the automatic door shut as he walked out of the kitchen.

"Fry," started the curious old man as he looked at Fry from across the table, "what is the matter?"

Fry suddenly stopped eating and patted his stomach.

"It's about Leela…and it sure is making me feel sick to my stomach."

"Go on," Hubert Farnsworth commanded.

"But, Professor, I really don't feel like—"

"Please, tell me!" the Professor interrupted.

"Okay, well, this is what happened," Fry began.

Zapp and Kif left Starbuck's with two Mocha Latte's in hand.

"Alright, Kif. We've been to the roller rink, the dry cleaner's, and Starbuck's. Where should we go next? Your pick, my friend."

Kif's big yellow eyes lit up.

"Well, I'd like to go to the—"

Zapp interrupted, "To the supermarket it is! Let's be off!"

Kif's shoulders drooped down as he quietly followed his new 'captain' for the week.

"So, that's what happened…" the Professor whispered as he rubbed his wrinkly old chin.

"Yeah," started Fry, "so I was gonna say nice, loving stuff when my now ex-best friend Bender made her believe that I was gonna say something bad and horrible."

The Professor just stared off into space, still rubbing his chin.

"Well, did you come up with any good advice for me?" Fry asked with curiosity, ready to soak in the Professor's wise knowledge.

"Whaaa...? What cupcakes? The ones I left on the counter yesterday afternoon?" the Professor said, dumbly.

"Oh, I give up!" Fry threw his hands in the air and walked out of the ship in a rage. He coincidently bumped into Leela, who was also walking out.

'_It's almost creepy how alike we are_,' Fry thought in his busy mind.

Leela's eye got watery and then she grabbed the pensive young man.

"Fry! I'm so sorry I didn't believe you! Can we please just put this behind us and be friends again? I can't believe I let myself believe BENDER instead of you…of all people…"  
Leela's arms were tight around Fry now, and she didn't seemd to want to let go.

"Yes! Of course we can be friends, Leela. I lo-"

"What?" Leela asked with great curiousity as she finally let go of the young man.

"Nothing...el zilcho. Heh, heh…Anyway, as for Bender…I don't know what I'm gonna do with him. He's got some explaining to do."

"Yeah, he does. What he did just isn't right. If it wasn't for me coming to my senses…Well, we might have never solved this catch-22, if you know what I mean." Leela said solemnly, as she tousled Fry's soft locks of orange hair.

"Hey, well, anyways…wanna go get a bite to eat? I've never ever been to Htrae before," Fry suggested.

"Me neither," started Leela, "I'd love to!"


	5. That Pompous Dimwit!

The two finally exited the ship, leaving the Professor and Zoidberg to finish the drudgery that business papers were.

Fry and Leela weren't sure of which restaurant they should go to, even though the places to eat were almost the same as Earth's; the names and logos were a little bit different.

"Alright, missy. Where do you wanna go?" Fry asked.

"I dunno. It's so hard to pick from the choice of Blue Lobster and Grape Garden."

Philip J. Fry chuckled and then shoved his hands into his blue jean pockets.

"Well, I know it's not all that fancy, but…we could always head over to that Chik-a-flik aross the street," Fry recommended timidly.

MEANWHILE

Zapp and Kif were done at the supermarket. The brown bags in Zapp's arms were quite a burden, very cumbersome; he almost dropped them all.

"Ah, good to be back on our wonderful Planet Express ship. Now all we have to do, Kif, my boy…is to put all of this bothersome food away."

Kif smiled.

"Sir, did you remember to get me that hummus? You know, the kind that was twenty percent off?"

"Your what-us?" Zapp inquired, rather dim-wittedly.

Kif slapped his forehead in distress.

The Big Z tripped over a box as he went to go put away the cereal in the cabinet.

"Ah, what's this? GAH! Fry and Leela forgot to deliver these candies!"

Fry sipped his sweet tea as he and Leela munched down their chicken sandwiches, which were lavished with Polynesian sauce.

"Man, this sure is tasty! I've never had better chicken before…does this ever hit the spot!" LEela exhaled as she polished off the last bite of her sandwich.

"Yeah," Fry began to comment, "and these golden waffle fries ain't too bad, either."

'_Sheesh, we could be a commercial!_' Fry thought, as he laughed inside.

Just then, the "Safety Dance" song started to play on Fry's watch.

"Oh, it's Zapp calling," Fry said.

"That pompous dimwit!" Leela excalimed as she gulped down what was remaining of her diet lemonade.

Zapp's image appeared on the tiny LCD screen on the watch.

"Hey, Fry. Oh, and hello to you, my gem of the galaxy. You two forgot to deliver the candy packages."

"Aw, crud!" Fry growled as he it the "off" button on the precious 31st century watch.

"Leela, we really gotta go back and get those."

But, as Fry might have already guessed, Leela was already off to get those packages and distribute them. It always seemed that a space captain's work was never done.

Fry stared at the ground, shoved his hands in his pockets yet again, and walked out sadly.

"Zapp, can you help me deliver these packages? Fry is hopeless with work...he never does things on time...and besides, you're probably stronger anyway." Leela picked up every package with grace as she put them on a navy blue dolley to transport them more easily.

The Big Z flashed a smile in Leela's direction and gladly picked up the remaining boxes with ease. The twosome had no idea that Fry was behind the door of the ship the whole time, about to go in, but...he had heard the whole conversation.

Fry broke down in tears and ran under the ship, where no one could see him.


	6. In the Woods

"I'll just sleep out here and die, and maybe even live with the other animals at the woods... or maybe even move to Omicron Persei 8 where they'll just execute me, anyway," the former pizza delivery boy said over-dramatically.

Fry started to walk toward the woods that were to the south of the large city that he was in.

"Sure is c-cold out here...anyone? Is anybody out here? Zapp, Leela?" Fry's voice broke as he said "Leea" with a high tone, in hope of finding her.

An icy, brisk wind swiftly blew across Fry's cold face. He wrapped his arms around himself, trying to keep warm. Although he had a red jacket on, it wasn't helping to keep him warm at all.

"Too bad it's February...I'm gonna freeze out here. I've gone too far in the woods to turn back...by the time I get back to the ship, it'll be nighttime," Fry thought outloud. No one would have heard him anyway.

The sky turned a vivid color of violet with hints of pink as Fry lay down on the cold, hard ground in the middle of the dense forest.

"Well, I guess I'll just go to sleep now. Man, I am such an idiot! I ran away all because stupid, dumb Zapp was helping Leela carry boxes! BOXES! And exactly HOW am I supposed to sleep out here? I may be an animal, but I sure ain't used to this get up!" Fry yelled with rage, and all toward himself, too.

Early that morning, Leela made her way to the ship's little kitchen bright and early, to make her favorite hazelnut coffee, as usual.

"Fry! Come get some coffee, if you want some," she called out as she did every single day, "Fry? Are you still sleeping? Oh, he must be."

The purple-haired woman got out of her cozy seat in the nook and walked toward Fry's bedroom door.

"Fry, are you awake?" Still, no sound seeped through the door or any of the thin openings around it. Leela barged in and went over to his bed, but it was empty.

"Where is that boy?" Leela dialed his number on her watch phone and awaited an answer.

'_Wherever he is, he'd better have a good explanation as to why he didn't help Zapp and me yesterday_,' she thought to herself.

Somewhere in the woods, about twenty birds flew off of Fry as the "Safety Dance" started to play out of nowhere. It was Fry's imfamous watch phone ringtone. The tired guy had a rude awakening waiting for him as he woke to the beautiful golden sunrise.

"GAH! What? Who's there? Whoever you are, please don't be bigger than me! Oh, yeah, and if you are, then don't eat me! AHHH!"

"Shut up, Fry, it's just me." Leela scolded through the watch phone's screen. Leela poked the screen, making an annoying tapping noise.

"Down here, Fry!" she yelled.

Fry looked down at Leela.

"Aw, Leela, you're in my phone!" Fry said stupidly as he smiled.

"Enough nonsense, Fry. Number one: why did you run away? And number two: WHERE WERE YOU YESTERDAY WHEN ZAPP AND I NEEDED YOUR HELP?" Leela said with an irate tone in her voice.

"Zapp? Who cares about him! He's just your dumb lover who you like better than me! This is what Zapp says: Ooh, kiss my big kissy face!" Fry made a dumb voice as he made his hand look as if it was speaking, moving the jaw up and down.

Leela's face turned red.

"Zapp is NOT my lover, and Fry...he's our friend! Why can't you get over the fact that I dated him ONCE and only once? It was a couple of years ago! And that is beside the point, anyway. You need to get home. Stop acting like some macho guy who can do anything."

"Leela, I could be better, if you'd just give me a chance..." Fry whispered.

It was too late to talk anymore. Leela hung up on the poor guy.

Fry sighed, as he did whenever Leela let him down.

"Well, I better head back to the ship."

He scared himself whenever he happened to step on a crunching leaf or a pile of twigs.

"I would have never survived out there, but I bet Leela would think that ZAPP could have. Man, I hate him now. Pretty boy..."


	7. Lunch Time!

Back at the ship, Leela was getting lunch ready. To her dismay. Bender was helping out.

"Just a pinch of salt..." he said cautiously as he, ironically, poured the whole containter of salt onto a frying pan.

Leela sighed and brushed hey hair out of her face.

"Ugh...why must Fry be so...so...dramatic? I don't even know if he deserves this lunch..."

She thought for a second about who was helping to cook it.

"Oh, wait. He does deserve it."

Zapp, Kif, and the whole crew came out for lunch.

On account of everyone being hungry, they were all very excited to eat, but once they saw that Bender was helping to prepare it, they all flinched at the sight.

After everyone was seated, Bender put the cold cans of Slurm on the table for everyone. It might have been the only edible item of consumption there. Or...maybe it wasn't.

Zapp took a sip, then checked the expiration date.

"Bender, my boy...this Slurm has been expired for five months."

Everyone put the cans down and they all made faces of disgust.

"Wow! All of my friends came!" the robot exclaimed with joy.

Dr. Zoidberg clapped his claws joyfully.

"Yay! Zoidberg is considered a friend of the ro-but! Finally!"

"Bender! You made Jambalaya? For my hungerin' Jamaican soul? That's so kind of you, mon!" Hermes Conrad gushed as he eyed the large,piping hot bowl in front of him.

The robot said, "Yeah, Hermes. It IS Jambalaya! I'm not sure if it's totally authentic, though, if you know what I mean. Take a taste of it, tubby!"

Hermes did so, and in the process, he spit it back out immediately.

Sweet waters of Aruba! What is this MADE out of?"

"Glad ya asked. I couldn't find chunks of meat, so I used rocks, I couldn't find tomato sauce, so I used Mom's Friendly Robot Oil, ad lastly, I also couldn't find any veggies so I simply threw in some fish guts. Creative, eh?" Bender uttered proudly.

"Yeah," the Jamaican man said, "if you were having the intentions of killing me, you dumb robot!"

Just then, the ship's front door swung open and a tired, cold, and dirty Frt stood there, his hair all out of place and filthy.

"Look, everyone, I know you're all probably real mad at me, but...I'm starving, and cold," he said as he shivered.

Zoidberg jumped up from his seat and took the oppurtunity to be intelligent. He scuttled over to Fry.

"Of course, the hypochondriac is back. You mammals need food every three hours. Cut him some slack, you party people."

The crew gaped at Zoidberg.


	8. I Don't Know, Meatbag

Leela suddenly stepped out of the group and put her hands on Fry's shaking shoulders.

"Alright, Fry. I'll forgive you this time."

A smile lit up the boy's face with relief and love towards the cycloptic woman.

"Thank you so much, Leela...this means a lot to me. A whole lot."

"Me too," the one-eyed girl whispered.

Fry lay awake back at this and Bender's apartment that night, whilst wondering about Zapp Brannigan and Leela.

"Bender?" Fry called from his largem worn-out bed, "Do you think that Leela and Zapp are a couple? I'm really worried and suspicious that they are..."

"I don't know, meatbag," Bender said from his room, which was the size of a human's closet, "but all I know is that you can't make he love you. Ahaha!" Bender laughed.

Even though Fry and Leela were good friends again, just like always, Fry cried and cried.

As Fry cried himself to sleep, Bender couldn't help but feel bad for the poor guy.

The next morning, Bender got up early and whipped up some breakfast for Fry.

Fry woke up as tired as ever, his whole body aching. He had gotten no sleep at all.

"Oh, man...that was terrible," he sighed as he threw his pillow onto the ground and rolled out of bed, since he felt as if he had no strength left. All of his weight fell onto the floor of his large, messy room.

"Good morning, meatbag!" Bender yelled with happiness as he bursted through Fry's bedroom door. The excited robot placed a tray of not-so-good looking breakfast on his bed.

Bender eyed Fry, who was lying on the ground helplessly.

"Uh," started Bender, "I hope you don't mind me asking, but...what's wrong with you?"

Fry opened his eyes slightly and saw that his vision was blurred from just waking up as he said, "Oh, I got, like, two hours of sleep last night...I'm aching all over."

"Come on, buddy you gotta lay down more," Bender said.

Fry slowlypicked up himself up and layed down again.

Bender decided to leave the makeshift room that he and Fry stayed in while on the ship and on another planet.


	9. You Got It, Little Lady!

Bender left for work without telling his best friend, the meatbag. Of course, all he had to do to go to work was walk out of his room and go into the lobby of the ship, where the conference table was.

He sat down next to Leela. All of the crew-members, including Zapp and Kif, stared at the nervous robot, because he was, indeed, over an hour late.

Bender pulled Leela into the kitchen, and Leela put her hands on her hips in an irate manner.

"What in the world is going on, Bender? You're an hour late, maybe even more, and Fry hasn't even shown up yet! All he had to do was walk through his door, for robot's sake!"

"Quiet down, honey. No one else can know, but...Fry's going crazy," Bender lied, "I think he's just sick, you know, from being out in the woods. He just needs a week off or so."

Leela skeptically started to walk away as she pulled her arm away from Bender's grasp.

"Alright, Bender...I'll believe you this time. Just don't let him make us all sick, too. Tell him on my behalf that he can have the week off. But YOU still need to work, Bender, so don't get any crazy ideas." Leela walked away.

"You got it, little lady," Bender chanted as he strided with bounce in his step to the conference table with everyone else.


	10. Make Me Loved

**CHAPTER 10**

Fry lay in bed powerlessly as he eyed a crimson box on his dresser. It was in the shape of a heart, the box cut precise and perfectly; sure to impress whomever someone had his or her eye on. Fry squinted, trying to see the box the way he was supposed to, but to him it just looked like a big red blob. He was in a haze, very drowsy, due to lack of sleep, and he couldn't see perfectly.

Fry took his chances and reached over weakly to feel it. He slightly smiled as he lifted the box's top off, and he then stayed in place on his bed and he solely felt around the box. Inside were little colorful, little, edible charms.

They were all different; some had little beads hanging off of them with little pink hearts on the bottom, while some were bright red with a hole in the middle, cut out in the shape of a tiny heart.

Fry suddenly realized what kind of candy this was. It was no ordinary candy. It was the love candy that made someone whom you loved to love you back. Fry grinned as he picked up a soft pink-colored one with a thread of edible beads hanging from it. At the end of the slew of rainbow-colored beads were two little candy hearts, one blue, and the other pink.

"Leela...you may not agree with this, but I'm doing this...I'm doing this for you and me," Fry whispered as he bit the morsel and savored the sweet, succulent flavor: the flavor of love.

Fry didn't even stop to think about how Leela would feel about this. Why would he? Leela was sure to love him back, now that he ate the candy. Fry closed his eyes and hoped to wake up as a loved person. But before he could fall asleep, he heard the sound of feet running up to his large on-ship room.


	11. Why, Leela, Why?

**CHAPTER 11**

Fry saw a mane of long, beautiful, purple hair burst into his door on the head of his favorite person. The person running down the hall had been Leela. Fry was thankful, because now it was time to see if the love candy had worked.

"Fry! Fry, I just wanted to kiss you good-bye before I go on my date."

Fry smiled and slowly sat up.

"Oh, hey baby! We're, uhh...going on a date?"

Leela giggled like a little kid, as if there was no care in the world, and no worry about anything bad to happen.

"Well, tonight I'm going on a date with my other boyfriend, the mayor's aid. He apologized about everything that happened that other time when he was mean to the orphans, and he came all the way to Htrae, just to see me! Isn't he just the sweetest thing? Plus, he doesn't have any sign of a vile lizard tongue, like that other guy I dated one time!"

Fry was puzzled as his heart started to pound; pound so hard that he heard it in his ears. The tension was building up inside him, more and more, with each second.

'_I thought that love candy was supposed to work!_' Fry's mind screamed. '_But, then again, why would she want to KISS me good-bye? This makes no sense_," he continued to think as a bead of sweat streamed down his hot cheek.

"But, Leela..." the dissapointed guy started desperately, 'I love you..."

"I know!" Leela said, surprisingly, with a cheerful tone, "I love you too, which is why our date is tommorow: just you and me."

Fry acted like he understood.

"Alright, uhh...babe...have fun, and I guess I'll see you later."

Fry layed back down with a thud as Leela strolled out while humming a love song, as positive as can be.

_'Okay, wait...why does she love two guys? I ate the love candy. She's supposed to love ONLY me, not me and that nerd._' Fry thought as he inched his way out of bed and took a sip of the glass of water on his dresser. He decided to get up. What was the good of laying around all day?

Of course, Fry still had on his dirty clothes from being in the woods. He didn't hesitate to slump into a seat at the rather tiny round conference table that the Professor had available for everybody while they were living on the ship. Zapp was too busy picking his teeth with a toothpick to even notice Fry come in.

"Good lord, Fry! You can't simply be wandering around the place! You're going to make us all sick!" the Professor yelled as he threw his arms into the air.

Fry yawned.

"Seriously, I'm fine. Hey, why's the table so little, and why are you making me live on the ship? You people are so mean!" Fry then scratched his butt mindlessly.

"Oh, he's back to normal," Amy said out loud. Fry started off into space. Although he seemed like he was thoughtless, he started to reminisce on what happened with Leela a little bit earlier. Pretty soon, a big glob of drool started to slowly seep out of his mouth.

"Ah, the robot seems even stupider now than before!" Zoidberg exclaimed as he pointed his left claw in Fry's direction.

"I did not!" Fry shouted idiotically and then started to cry.

Bender got up from his seat and pounded the table with his fists.

"I'm the robot, over HERE, you big idiot lobster!"

The Professor was getting fed up.

"Why don't you all just be stupid somewhere else! When I asked you all to join my company, I wanted loyal partners, hard workers...not bumbling, loud-mouthed idiots!"

The crew's spirits seemed inferior at the end of Hubert J. Farnsworth's long tirade.

"Sorry, Professor..."each one of the crew members whispered. Except for, that is, Fry. He was in too deep of a daze to even know what was going on, where he was, and what he ate for breakfast. His thoughts were flying all around his mind, yet at the same time were all crunched together, so tight that he couldn't put his finger on one problem at a time.

He only knew one thing: he had to find out why Leela loved two men at the same time, when he was the one who ate the love candy.


	12. Fake Black Moustache? YES!

**CHAPTER 12**

Fry got up from his small chair immediately, leaving the chair spinning as everyone wondered where he might be going. Everyone gaped at the sight. Fry was acting incredibly strange. He wasn't being his stupidly cute self. He was being creepily stupid. While everyone, including Kif, sat there in shock, Zapp broke out a moist towelette and slipped off his gloves.

The Big Z realized everyone was staring at him, so he decided to make conversation.

'_They must be looking at my erotic, sexy velour uniform_,' he thought, '_Well,_ I _might as well go for it and seduce them all._'

"Those were some succulent mutated buffalo wings Bender cooked up, eh?" The Zapper said rather loudly and obnoxiously as he rubbed his moist towelette even harder in his palms.

Kif sighed and slapped his forehead as he always did when Zapp made a dumb comment.

Meanwhile, Fry had a plan. Or, at least he was trying to come up with one. He sat on his bed and whimpered.

"W-what am I supposed to do? Hmmm. Oh! I got it," he said excitedly, "I could watch Leela on her date with the mayor's aid! I bet they went to the Palms D'orbit! That's that dude's favorite place, because the mayor owns it! Then maybe I can finally figure out what's going on."

Fry was in his small room, throwing on all of the black clothes he could find, to disguise himself, even if he was still extremely tired. He threw on anything black that he could find. He spoke under his breath as he put everything on.

"Black underwear...good...a black top hat? Great...umm, how about this black girdle? Nope, I forgot, that's Zapp's. Alright, I've got a black suit and my black hat on, plus the underwear, but I need more..." Fry exhaled.

"A fake black moustache? Yes, no, wait, no still! Yes, yes...no, YES!" He stuck it on.

He threw things out of his drawer while simultaneously looking for more black items of clothing. He managed to find a black bowtie, black dress shoes, and a black cape. He chuckled as he slammed his drawer shut and ran out of the ship quite discreetly.

The Professor was back in the tiny kitchen, at the table with everybody else.

"What happened just now?" he asked, while positioning his thick glasses in just the right spot.

Fry ran and ran, and tried to catch his breath. He slowed down and put his hands on his knees as he began to pant like a dog. He took off the tophat for a minute.

"Man! It's all the moustache's fault, isn't it? That's what's making me so hot! Thanks a lot, Stachey!" he said, faint of breath, as he pointed at the phony facial hair.

Fry then thought for a second.

'_Wait. Who the heck names a moustache?!_' he thought as he rubbed his chin. '_Oh, yeah, me. Okay, now I've got to think of something more important...AHHH! Crud, I never should have started thinking in the first place, because..._'

The restaurant he needed to go to was in space itself!

"Aw, crud...how am I supposed to get to Palms D'orbit now? I need to ship! Ah...the ship. The Professor's going to _kill_ me!"

Fry decided there was only but one thing left to do: run back to the ship and plead the Professor for use of it.

So he did so, running, running, and panting some more. He was so horrifically tired that sweat even dripped from his fake black moustache.

He slid the door open extremely fast and ran frantically over to the Professor, his moustache peeling off, tophat about ready to tip off of his head, and his tiny black bowtie crooked.

"Professor, Professor, PROFESSOR!" Fry screamed loud enough to interrupt Bender's soap Opera, "All My Circuits".

"Shut your noise-hole!" Bender shouted forcefully from his small bedroom closet on the ship. A plasma TV was hung on the wall for him.

Hubert Farnsworth gasped.

"Fry! Don't scream like that, you're going to give me a heart attack for the twentieth time!"

Fry sighed and placed his hands on the Professor's shoulders, trying to feel a little bit of rest, if it was possible to feel rest at all after running a few miles with barely any sleep the previous night.

"Look, I'm sorry," the young man started, "I really need, and I mean NEED the ship."

"Why do you need the ship at this late an hour? And besides, we're all living on it, you blundering idiot! You can't just drive it around the universe with your friends trying to sleep!"

"I said I'm sorry...I just need it for an hour. Please?" Fry plead.

"But why, if I may ask?"

"Because...I ate one of those candies and---"

"WHAT? Fry, you dense jerk! How could you eat one of those candies without my permission?"

"Hey, YOU'RE my nephew, not the other way around."

Meanwhile, Leela and the mayor's aid were, indeed, eating at the Palms D'orbit, just about ready to be served their food. Althought it crashed into the Amazonian planet one time, it was recovered by the restaurant owners with help from none other than Zapp Brannigan.


End file.
